7. Give their new bands a try
You may not like it, and that’s fine. Or, you may love it, and that’s awesome. Caveat emptor: This is not going to be the band you love reincarnated, so be realistic. What itis is a reflection of a part of your favorite band. When you see the pieces separated, how your favorite band worked as a whole may become clearer. Or, it may help you understand what the artist’s other passion is and why it makes sense for them to branch off.
8. Don’t feel the need to pick sides
If your favorite band broke up under nasty circumstances and in-fighting, it has probably tarnished your view of one or more of the members of the band, but if it hasn’t and you’d rather listen to the music and not worry about the personal issues that’s great. Other fans may pick sides, you may pick sides, but you don’t have to. It’s okay to support two opposing forces. Likewise, artists: Discouraging or shaming your fans from liking other artists you have a personal issue with is a huge no-no. It’s your drama, not theirs. (Also, grow up.)
9. Don’t take it as a fan punishment
Fans are prone to blaming the behavior of other fans for things band do or do not do. The classic example is the totally illogical: “They won’t come out and meet us because some fans on Tumblr write explicit fanfiction.” No. Stop. First of all, the rest of the fanbase are currently the only people in the world who have even an inkling of what you’re going through, so picking fights is just going to decrease your chances of community support. While a band may be “your life,” it is actually literally the musician’s life, and something like a little homoerotic fiction floating in the abyss of the web that they most likely aren’t even aware of isn’t going to spawn a breakup.
10. Know that it’s okay to be sad
Many people are going to give you the “it’s just a band” treatment. They’re just trying to comfort you, but it can feel belittling. If the music was a massive part of your life, it’s perfectly fine to be upset. You’re probably even going to go through a few of the various stages of grief, and it’s important to let yourself feel those things and heal. People might not understand your investment in the artist and why you’re feeling the way you do, but it doesn’t matter. What you’re feeling is valid whether it’s understood or not.
11. Preserve and protect the band’s legacy
You might have boxes and boxes of memories from the band’s career, a noggin full of facts that you’ve accumulated or a stellar collection of their work on every playable music format known to man. Fans are basically living, breathing encyclopedias for the things they love. So, as long as you can carry and share the band’s history, they’ll never really be gone. If you want to get tripped out: Until the very last fan of your favorite band dies, they will forever exist within a living, breathing organism. What?! Think about it…
12. Treasure their back catalog
The main things a breakup mean to you are: You will not hear new material from the artist and you will not see them in concert. BUT, more than likely, you have years and years of music that means the world to you, and you will always have that.
“I heard someone say/That ‘nothing gold can stay’/But there’s a love in all our souls/And it shines like gold.” –Bouncing Souls, “The Gold Song”