Better Hate Than Never
The poor bastard at the top of this blog is me, dealing with the city of Cleveland's ingenious way of clearing the streets of snow--by piling a ton of it in front of my driveway. Of course, they do it at night so the snow turns to clumps of ice which weigh more than Jesse Lacey's ego. This isn't the first time I've had to do this, and the very thought of it makes me hope the wives/girlfriends of the drivers are sneaking out behind their backs and doing things that would make Jenna Jameson recoil in horror.
Anyway, the whole experience made me so mad, I went back in the house and put together Misanthromix 2K9, a playlist that scooches me closer toward spontaneous combustion. My sonic equivalent of a lead pipe filled with cement and dipped in cobra venom includes:
BLOOD BROTHERS: "Fucking's Greatest Hits"
THE LOCUST: "Wet Dream War Machine"
THE DILLINGER ESCAPE PLAN: "Hollywood Squares"
COMBATWOUNDEDVETERAN: "My Spine! My Spine! My Spine!"
CONVERGE: "You Fail Me"
AMEN: "Piss Virus"
LEATHERMOUTH: "My Lovenote Has Gone Flat"
THE BRONX: "Shitty Future"
C.AARME: "Gasmask"
SIRHAN SIRHAN: "Blood"
CEREMONY: "It Rained Today Inside My Head"
MINISTRY: "Flashback"
SOME GIRLS: "Deathface"
Thirteen "lucky" songs, guaranteed to ruin your day, or at the very least, make you understand the concept of "going postal" without having to actually punch a clock at the good ol' USPS. It's interesting how we talk about music that gets us through hard times, reflects on loves lost or makes a long drive tolerable. Yet I've never partaken in any kind of discussion that posits what kind of psych-up soundtrack people would choose to, say, put the beatdown on that bitch/scumbag who's been stalking their significant others. The music of choice when you get double-billed by a credit-card company for the third time. The sound patterns of glory when the next micro-managing vermin comes into my office to get pissy with me... Oops! Sorry for the projection!
So let's hear it: Someone has kicked your dog, called your mom a slut and accused you of liking White Tie Affair. What are you going to put on just before you grab your aluminum ball bat to seek some batta-batta-swing therapy?
POSTSCRIPT: After I ate half a bottle of Motrin to deal with my post-shoveling aches, I went out and got Chinese food. This was the fortune in my cookie. I don't care: Snowplow truck drivers still suck.
11 Comments:
Truth in a fortune cookie, what will happen next? Thanks again for the help last Saturday. Right now I cannot even think of 13 songs for a beat down psych up, too focused on the sprog.
C.AARME FTW. I've never met/talked to someone else who even knows who they are.
And very nice choice of LeATHERMOUTH. I would definitely have them on my list, as well as some Every Time I Die, Norma Jean and Blood Brothers. Maybe a 3OH!3 song for kicks. "Punk Bitch" and/or "Chokechain."
And digging back to 8th grade, Hatebreed's "I Will Be Heard."
System Of A Down's "Soil", Gallows "Rolling With The Punches", Every Time I Die's "Pigs Is Pigs", and From Autumn To Ashes "Vicious Cockfight" are just a few of the songs that make me wanna tear some ass even when I'm not mad.
"No Person is important enough to make you angry.... IN BED" That's what it really means.
There's nothing like something loud, fast and angry to keep me from running through the office, ripping down some random cubicle walls. C.AARME's 'Gasmask' graces my list as well! Along with Anti-Flag's 'This is the End', Incubus' 'Make Yourself', Minor Threat's 'Steppin Stone', Rancid's 'Rattlesnake', The Used's 'Liar, Liar (Burn in Hell) and S.T.U.N's 'Movement'.
whoa. no mclusky? specifically, "to hell with good intentions"? that song makes me want to BREAK STUFF, limp bizkit-style.
you should've put a naked city song up there, that band really puts me on edge
Awww. Leathermouth is on there. That makes me smile, not scowl.
I'd probably listen to David Cook or something else really terrible. After two songs, the day would be ruined. After 13, the week.
This is unrelated, but are you releasing Saviours & Suckers? And if so, why the delay? If not, why not? I really want to hear it.
Wow. Jason Pettigrew's blog has the ability to bring Joe Strummer back from the dead. Impressive.
@ Monica & Weird-o: Thank you for showing love to the mighty C.Aarme. I really like the second disc, as well. "No gasmask! Don't need one!"
@ Annie: My love is your bigger than love.
@ Siberian: Naked City's L'ENCHE (sp?)is a slow-motion apocalypse, fo' sho'.
@ Joe Strummer: I refuse to issue S&S on CD because as soon as it gets out, it'll be an appetizer on the internet's downloading buffet and it won't sell five copies. Now if you wanna loan me a briefcase of cash,I'll pay you back as soon as the vinyl pressings sell out. You in?
@ Cam: A secret society has been trying to corrupt my blog for purposes of evil. Even under the threat of torture, I steadfastly refuse to write about bottom-scraping twenty-nothing crunk-core acts.
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