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Put Your Real Life On Pause: It seems like you can't turn on the TV, flip through the newspaper or go online without reading something about how the economy is in the toilet. I get it, we all do. But do we have to dwell on it all the time? I say no. But just in case you want to, here are some repression-approved programs to ensure you don't forget that Wall Street has pretty much turned to cannibalism.

Monday: Operation Repo (10p.m. on truTV)

Real-life repossessions on tape. Part of me feels like this kind of thing shouldn't be exploited for our own twisted entertainment, where we're simply marveling at other people's misfortunes. But then again, a part of me kind of wants to watch it.

Tuesday: The Hunt For Black Gold (9p.m. on CNBC)

If it worked for the Clampets, it can work for you. So go hunting, but just shoot at the ground, and find oil. I'm pretty sure that's how it happens.

Wednesday: Reno 911! (10:30p.m. on Comedy)

Sure, cable TV costs money, but laughter is the best medicine. (Don't ask me why those two things are related. Who's blog is this? Yours? No.) So with a new season of Reno 911 starting, who needs universal healthcare?

Thursday: Survivor (8p.m. on CBS)

For proof that you can survive for at least 39 days on nothing but rice, beans and the occasional reward-challenge buffet, you need look no further than Survivor. And wouldn't life be great if we had challenges like that in real life, where we had to stand on tree stumps for hours and solve puzzles and throw clay things at other clay things all in the hopes of winning immunity?

Friday: American Loggers (10p.m. on Discovery)

Looking for a job now that graduation is on the horizon? Ever considered logging? After seeing just how brutal it is, you might think twice about it. Crab fishing can't be that bad, right?

B.F.F.

Put Your Real Life On Pause: There's no one in the world quite like your BFF. They laugh when you laugh, cry when you cry, spill soda all over your car when you slam on the brakes for a squirrel in the road that actually wasn't a squirrel but was a plastic bag that looked a lot like a squirrel from that angle. You've been there right? And where would we be without them? In jail for a lot longer because no one else would fork over the cash to bail us out, that's for sure. But enough about BFFs; This week, I want to help you be your own best friend (forever). Here's some recommended watching to help you help you.

Monday

Intervention (9p.m. on A&E)

This one's kind of an ace in the hole. Intervention teaches you valuable life lessons, while also scaring the daylights out of you, ensuring you never ever smoke meth at a horse-racing track.

Tuesday

Press Conference with President Obama (8p.m. on ABC/NBC/CBS/FOX/Everywhere)

Admittedly, this will likely be less entertaining than it was watching our commander-in-chief on Leno, but President Obama commands attention. It's on every major network, so it will be pretty unavoidable. Get civic, kiddo.

Wednesday

America's Next Top Model (8p.m. on CW)

I know what you're thinking, and no. I don't want you to pursue modeling as a career. I want you to stay in school and realize your dreams. Watching this should motivate you (or make you want to claw your own eyes out).

Thursday

30 Rock (9p.m. on NBC)

Tell me this: What can't we learn from Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin? Okay, you got me on Mandarin Chinese. You win this round.

Friday

Dog Whisperer (8p.m. on NGC)

Trust us: When your BFF gets out of control, just make that "shhht!" sound through your teeth and poke them in the neck. It works for Cesar every time.

A Little Madness

Put Your Real Life On Pause: For those of you who live under a rock--or more than 30 miles away from a college with a basketball team--March Madness is upon us. So what does that mean? Since the opening round begins this week that means everyone will be lamenting and/or celebrating their bracket selections, but more importantly, it means some of your shows won't be on at their usual time and place. I know. I'm not happy about it either, but let's make due with what we've got.

Monday

House, M.D. (8p.m. on FOX)

I'm betting it's Lupus, or that they're at least going to test for Lupus. It's their go-to diagnosis.

Tuesday

House Hunters International (10p.m. on HGTV)

Not only will your mom be thrilled that you're watching HGTV, but this show will give you some sweet escape routes should the endless basketball over the ensuing weeks drive you completely nuts. Just sayin'.

Wednesday

Vanguard (10p.m. on Current)

Easily one of my absolute favorite shows on my absolute favorite channel, Vanguard won't give in to the madness. Vanguard is a sweet half-hour documentary, this week's topic is the credit debt crisis facing our generation. Learn now or pay later.

Thursday

College Basketball (it's everywhere)

Don't try to escape it today. Since it's the opening round games, there are still at least 742 teams in this thing.

Friday

Most Haunted (10p.m. on Travel)

What's scarier than all of your shows being pushed back for weeks? This haunted British ship! Check it.

TVs Best Bad Guys

Put Your Real Life On Pause:What's Batman without the Joker? Superman without kryptonite? Bart Simpson without Sideshow Bob and Mr. Burns? That's right, even the good guys need balance. So this week, I'm bringing you the best in bad guys. Now some villains are just legendary, in the reality category for example: American Idol's Simon Cowell, the Apprentice's Emarosa, Survivor's Johnny Fairplay, the Hills' Spencer Pratt and the most recent Bachelor who was clearly a total jerk. We need these cold, mean, borderline real people to balance out the Lauren Conrads and Paula Abduls of the world. When it comes down to it, we want there to be bad guys. Who are the worst of the worst on TV this week? I'm glad you asked.

Monday

Sylar on Heroes (8p.m. on NBC)

Is he a hero or a villain? In this week's episode, Sylar meets his father during an "unusual reunion." Cryptic. I'm intrigued.

Tuesday

Cupcakes with sprinkles on The Biggest Loser (8p.m. on NBC)

Alright, so Tuesday's a little light on evil-doers. I can't say cupcakes are always bad, on the contrary, they're usually quite delicious in the right context. Honestly, I admire the contestants on The Biggest Loser--it takes guts to exercise and get on a scale in front of millions of people. I won't even go to the gym.

Wednesday

Benjamin Linus and/or Charles Widmore on Lost (9p.m. on ABC)

Which one is bad? Which one is good? We don't know! But then again, do we really know anything about Lost? However, since Ben totally killed Locke, my money's on him as the villain.

Thursday

Jury duty on 30 Rock (9:30p.m. on NBC)

When is jury duty a good thing? Everyone tries to dodge it, but this week it claims our beloved Liz Lemon. It's going to be hilarious.

Friday

Bratty kids on The Supernanny (9p.m. on ABC)

Truth be told, I only watch the first half-hour or so of Supernanny. Once the kids start behaving, it gets boring. I guess that's what would happen if Batman put the Joker on a time-out mat, and the the Joker started doing his chores and saying "please" and "thank-you." Who wants to live in that kind of world?

New shows, stat!

Put Your Real Life On Pause: You may or may not have realized that after about 65 seasons, ER is finally looking at its watch and calling it. Why ER is ending, we can't be sure. It was ER that made me want to be a doctor (we can all see how that turned out), but never want to go to a hospital because I knew what was going on behind-the-scenes (holy love triangle, batman!). So while we still have some time, I wanted to prepare you for the two-hour season finale on April 2. George Clooney (Doug) and Julianna Margulies (Carol) will be back! And Susan Sarandon and Gilmore Girls' Alexis Bledel will also make guest appearances in the finale (though their characters are supposed to be introduced in next week's episode on March 12). Speaking of ER, I hear Chris Brown and Rihanna have reconciled, so in the spirit of forgiveness, let's take this week to reconcile with the shows that may or may not have assualted our intelligence (or our faces) in the past. It's time to put it all behind us, and watch....

Monday
The Bachelor (8 p.m. on ABC)
It's the finale, so if there's a time to watch the Bachelor, it's now--even for those of you with commitment issues.

Tuesday
Late Night with Jimmy Fallon (12:30 a.m. on NBC)
Goodbye Conan, Hello Jimmy. That's right, Jimmy Fallon is officially taking over for Conan O'Brien this week. (I guess you could start watching on Monday, but I don't want to be the guinea pig.) In some ways, I feel like Fallon's had enough chances, but let's just give him this one. Besides, Tina Fey is his guest and we know we can count on her to be funny.

Wednesday
America's Next Top Model (8 p.m. on CW)
Usually I like to watch America's Top Model only in marathons, but this week's two-hour premeire kicks off a whole new season. Tyra Banks annoys the living daylight out of me, but let's watch it for Miss J.

Thursday
The Office (9 p.m. on NBC)
That's right, the Office is in need of forgiveness. That past few episodes have been downright disappointment, and quite frankly, they've built us up to expect so much more from Michael Scott & Co. I want things to be the way they used to be, so since it's a Valentine's Day episode, I'm going to give them a clean slate.

Friday
Oh, who are we kidding? There really isn't anything good on Friday night this week except for Ghost Whisperer, but I'm so behind on that show that no amount of DVR-ing can help me. So this week, trade the small screen for the big screen and see some of the Oscar-winners (or should-have-been-winners) or rent Beverly Hills Chihuahua, like I will be doing...

As always, let me know what I missed (or should have missed). Happy Watching!