APFFL Week 9 and a half

So I'm super-late on getting you last weekend's results from the AP Fantasy Football League.

So late that it's actually a whole new weekend already.

And Week 10 of the season actually started on Thursday.

I'm not a mathemagician, but I think that means I really need to get to these scores.

Dandy Van Slykes (90) def. I Hate California (64)

Aw. You'd think with all the times I hoped Katie would get a win that the one time I play her, I'd sorta let her have one. Nah, son. She may be my girlfriend and I may have actually been visiting her for the weekend, but that didn't stop me from housing her team. I didn't mean to. I actually didn't even check my team. Sure, my record now put me in a tie for first place. But, believe me, nobody wins when Katie loses. Except for the Communists. I don't even know what that means.

Team Exitonefiftytwo (54) def. San Diego Whale Vaginas (50)

The hazard of having two kickers on your team (as Scott and the Whale Vaginas do) is that you always run the risk of playing the wrong one. While Scott's golden boy Robbie Gould net him 10 points, his benched kicker David Akers woulda got him 16 and the win over Ben, who somehow succeeded with a Raider in his lineup.

Venice Marmots (95) def. Awesometown Unicorns (35)

I think Cam mighta given up this week as she and the Unicorns started three players who were off last weekend. Still, Laura and the Marmots probably woulda taken out pretty much any other team in the league with a crazy-good output. I've said it before and I'll likely say it again next week: Fantasy football is a fickle, fickle mistress. Laura got 95 points when she only needed 36. Next week, she'll inevitably lose by 64 points. Nothing against Laura. It's just, well, the whole fickle mistress thing.

Milwaukee Milkmen (70) def. Rambunctious Coons (58)

Ronny and the Rambunctious ones suffered some tough luck this week when Michael Pittman went on injured reserve and Larry Johnson kept getting suspended for potentially being a sociopath. That hurt him against top-rated Zach. I'm beginning to realize that if Zach can't lose with Chad Pennington at QB, he's probably never gonna lose.

Team Marcella (82) def. Chicago Quails (58)

Nobody look now, but Heather and Team Marcella are creeping up the standings. Not bad for a team formerly known as the "Ghost Team." She fielded a straight-up impressive team and made short work of Chris and the Quails. With a couple savvy moves, Heather has become the comeback GM of the year so far. I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say she may or may not be in consideration for the Detroit Lions general manager position.

85 Mafia (82) def. Cleveland Hasselhoffs (25)

Would you look at that. In the battle of AP staffers, copy editor Jen handily defeated ad exec/mustache aficionado Zak. I can't be certain, but I'm pretty sure Zak became the first player in the league not to have a single player reach double digit points. In fact, all of his wide receivers, running backs and quarterback combined didn't reach double digit points. But let's not discount Jen's victory. 82 points is pretty impressive. And to think that next week, she'll finally get to play newly appointed Browns starter/dreamboat/Republican Brady Quinn. Change is coming.