Why have all my childhood crushes decided to butch up and turn into macho assholes? You’re pretty boys, get used to it! Observe:
‘90s Lance Bass

Today’s Lance Bass
Who the fuck are you fighting!? You were in the video for “Bye Bye Bye”, for fuck’s sake! Shave, go back to being blond, and stop being so insecure.
‘90s White Ranger

Today’s White Ranger

Complete with bad tattoos. And don’t get me started on MMA (in which the typical round involves two minutes of sizing each other up, 30 seconds of actuall fighting, and two and a half minutes of dry humping.)
‘90s Leonardo Dicaprio

This is awesome! Why would you want to change this?!
And today’s Leo

“Grrr, look at me. Sure, it took me a month to grow this peach fuzz I call a goatee, but don’t I look all rugged? I think I’ll do this for ALL my movies for no reason.”
Granted, the photo was taken from The Departed, which totally kicked ass. Still, no excuse.
There’s a conspiracy behind this. I know there is.












