Just when you thought the world had enough Christmas songs, 2014 came along and was like, “Ha-ha! Nope!” and shoved hundreds more at us. The AP editorial team combed through a long list of snow-y, bell-laden Kringle jingles to dig up a brand new soundtrack for your Christmas that will lift your spirits and maybe upset your grandparents a bit.

BECOMING THE ARCHETYPE – “O Holy Night”

Sure, absolutely ridiculous re-works of classic Christmas jingles aren't necessarily anything new (*cough* August Burns Red *cough*), but Becoming The Archetype's cover of “O Holy Night” will have you chugging egg nog and moshing around your Christmas tree faster than you can say “Ho, ho, ho.” While the band keep things family-friendly on the first half of the track, they throw caution to the wind and blisteringly growl and shred their way through the the second. —Tyler Sharp



 

DENT MAY – “I’ll Be Stoned For Christmas”

Nestled comfortably atop the 80’s synth grooves that have been super hip all year, Dent May’s “I’ll Be Stoned for Christmas” could soundtrack a beach party as easily as your holiday hotbox. Cheesy play-on-words aside, the track is so damn charming you’ll have May’s lazy lounge stylings wedged in your ears all Yuletide. May, an indie psych-pop musician known for playful lyrical winks, positively relishes lines like “Tis the Season to be Highhhhh!” Sure, it’s stupid, but mostly stupid fun. “I’m sorry, Mama,” May croons during a bopping sing along chorus that proves that statement falser than a plastic tree. With tunes this silly, it’s easy getting green. —Lee McKinstry

 

DZ DEATHRAYS – “Lonely This Christmas”

Aussie post-punkers DZ Deathrays are a duo that pack enough voltage to wound as the funnest, dirtiest, danciest way to blow out your eardrums. The reverence they pay to glam-rock brattiness comes full circle with their cover of “Lonely This Christmas” a pity party first released by English glam group Mud in 1974. DZ’s is a messy affair that recalls a bar sing along more than a Christmas carol. That’s the point, and even easier to visualize once the boys start a slurry spoken plea to their ex-girls. With jams this fun, it’s a case for ending year like you started it—drunk in love. —Lee McKinstry

 

FIT FOR A KING – “God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman”

When it comes to walking the fine line between chaos and control, Fit For A King manage to do so time and time again without missing a single step. While on their rendition of “God Rest Ye Merry Gentleman” they almost entirely refrain from their typical heavy tendencies, they do, in turn, contrive a sound that showcases not only their versatility, but is far more fitting, as well. The band gracefully weave their way in and out of the song's verses and chorus, until they climax into a monumental bridge that could even get Scrooge himself to sing along. —Tyler Sharp

 

THE KILLERS – “Joel, The Lump Of Coal”

Something about the Killers and the holidays just goes together so well. The band teamed up with Jimmy Kimmel to make this upbeat Christmas song that follows the story of a sentient lump of coal. “What kid would ever want you? You’re filthy as can be,” Brandon Flowers sings about Joel (the living lump of coal), who is eventually turned into a giant diamond. After this, I’ll take any thing the Killers have to offer. —Matt Crane

 

NEW FOUND GLORY – “Snow”

New Found Glory tone down the pop-punk for this cheery holiday number. “And I’ll count the photos in the hallway of my family that have passed,” Jordan Pundik sings over a warm acoustic melody. As if NFG’s classic jams didn’t already make you nostalgic enough, now you’ll have Christmas memories to tie them to. —Matt Crane

 

SIRENS & SAILORS – “You're A Mean One Mr., Grinch”

The metalcore carolers in S&S went full-Christmosh on an already-salty song. I never thought I'd live to hear guttural screams of “Grinch!” eclipsed by breakdowns. Come to think of it, this would be a far cheaper substitute than coal for naughty children. —Brian Kraus

 

TONY THAXTON “Santa Claus. December 26”

Last week, former Motion City Soundtrack drummer Tony Thaxton issued a seven-song holiday mini-LP, A Very Merry Feliz Navipod To You, Your Friends And Family And Everybody Else! The EP features the participation of friends like Alison Weiss, Sara Watkins (Nickel Creek), Chris Farren and a cast of hun…uh… tens?On “Santa Claus. December 26,” Motion City bassist Matt Taylor reunites with his ol' bud for a song announcing Santa's future plans, post-holiday (“I need three-hundred/sixty-four days off!”). It's three minutes of seasonal fun that will sound great on your holiday playlist between the Beach Boys' “Little Saint Nick” and Weezer's “Christmas Celebration.” Here's hoping Thaxton's holiday-pop proclivities are a sign of some great rockin' to come. Jason Pettigrew

 

TRESPASSERS – “Last Christmas” (Originally by WHAM!)

“Last Christmas” is a flamboyant favorite of mine every holiday season. The fondest memories include using it to drive a Grinchy college roommate to the edge. Recent Spartan Records signees Trespassers learned the song for Homesick, the label's new Christmas compilation. Their take isn't far off from Jimmy Eat World's—just a swell, brooding emo-rock interpretation. We'll take it! —Brian Kraus

 

DALLON WEEKES – “Sickly Sweet Holidays”

Panic! At The Disco bassist Dallon Weekes joined forces with Falling In Reverse drummer Ryan Seaman to create my favorite type of Christmas song: The disenchanted-with-the-whole-holiday type. Weekes pines in the Nightmare Of You-esque tune, “Oh, lights are shining dead, but I feel dead/The sickly sweet holidays keep me in bed.” Unfortunately for the Scrooges among us, “Sickly Sweet Holidays” shines alright when the figure of the narrator’s affection returns mid-track. —Cassie Whitt