The 17 most rock 'n' roll TV performances you’ll ever see

Recently, I was led to believe that Chicago rock band the Orwells blew up the internet with a “wild,” “high-energy” and “amazing” appearance on The Late Show With David Letterman. Now I like to keep up with what Warped Tour Nation and Planet Pitchfork deem as the proverbial “shit,” so I ponied up a click to check out the Orwells’ blistering, shroud-of-Turin replicating, cancer-curing performance of “Who Needs You,” so I too, may bask in the New Sound Of Today™. One young magazine editor schooled all the haters by tweeting, “Everyone that is hating on the Orwells right now on Twitter are 40+, have boring lives, & unhappy marriages. Get the fuck.” (In full disclosure, I am well over 40, have been divorced for eight months and have been having more fun than ever listening to music and having my world rocked significantly by my French film star/agent provocateur girlfriend.)

Now I have absolutely nothing against the Orwells. Whether they get their Warhol-annointed 15 minutes or if Courtney Love starts clawing the door of the apartment where singer Mario Cuomo is couch-surfing, whatever: I prefer Bolthouse Farms’ Daily Greens to Haterade. For those who don’t know history (and those who certainly do know better, but have ridiculous click-quotas to fill for their corporate masters’ bidding), here are some glorious moments of rock on TV from the last 40 years you might enjoy.

THE WHO: “My Generation” on The Smothers Brothers Show
The legend goes that maniac drummer Keith Moon (RIP) gave one of the tech guys a significant bribe to put more explosive charge in his kick drum than was actually safe. (It’s at the 2:28 mark.) And yes, it’s obvious that parts of this track are mimed. Let’s go behind the soundboard at your favorite bands’ gigs and see what they have running, you all-knowing, proud, scene-kid commenter, you.

THE WHITE STRIPES: “Goin’ Back To Memphis” on Late Night With Conan O’Brien

AT THE DRIVE-IN: “One-Armed Scissor” on Late Night With Conan O’Brien

FEAR on Saturday Night Live

This is America’s official introduction to moshing (then referred to as “slam dancing”). Was that Ian MacKaye yelling “New York suuuuuucks” from the pit? >>>

NIRVANA: “Rape Me” and “Lithium” on MTV Music Video Awards

The bass player from the biggest band in the world (at the time) goes for cool points and gets a mild concussion with a stunt gone wrong. The charismatic lead singer figures the bed has already been shat in, so he decides to go on a romp himself. They would later shut up their detractors with their Unplugged performance the following year.

TYLER THE CREATOR AND HODGY BEATS OF ODD FUTURE: “Sandwitches” on The Late Show With Jimmy Fallon

Tyler, The Creator & Hodgy Beats – Sandwitches live @ Jimmy Fallon from MR Popo on Vimeo.
How many hip-hop performances feature members of the Roots, a relative of the Travelocity elf, both actress Felicia Day and rap mainstay Mos Def keeping their poise when their space gets invaded and the performing artist riding piggyback on top of the show’s host? Just one.

M.I.A.: “Born Free” on The Late Show With David Letterman

Clone one attitudinal rapper several times, add one punk/industrial/noise avatar on synthesizer (Suicide’s Martin Rev) and get to work. This was broadcasted July 2010, which makes David Letterman’s final quip even funnier.

MIDNIGHT OIL: “Read About It” on Thicke Of The Night

There’s more than one way to have a fiery performance, but only one will get you pixilated on national television (at 2:34). You do get to see a roadie scramble to contain the, um, “event.”

ELVIS COSTELLO: “Radio Radio” on Saturday Night Live

Despite playing “Less Than Zero” at rehearsal where all the camera angles and timings were planned in advance, Costello (who was actually subbed in after the Sex Pistols’ visas never came through) changed his mind. It threatened to deep-six his career: The stunt got him banned from the show for 10 years until 1998, when…