noah cyrus tears
[Photo via Instagram/noahcyrus]

Noah Cyrus proves emo-ness by selling her actual tears

Noah Cyrus recently went through a very public and drama-filled breakup from rapper Lil Xan. As if airing all of your personal grievances on Instagram to become the most emo breakup of 2018 isn’t bad enough, Cyrus is now selling her actual tears.

In the midst of making headlines due to her breakup earlier this month, Cyrus took the opportunity to announce her upcoming (and appropriately named) EP, Good Cry, was set to drop Sept. 21.

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Apparently the perfect marketing opportunity for an EP donning that name is to sell your actual tears in a bottle for $12,000, which is exactly what Cyrus is doing.

“This is approximately 12 tears made by Noah Cyrus as a result of sadness,” the site’s description reads. “Human digestion of these tears is not suggested cause tears are generally pretty salty and that would just be super fucking weird if you drank someone else’s tears.”

noah cyrus pizza slime
[Photo via store.pizzaslime.com

The singer posted on her Instagram that the product (among other things) is available via Pizza Slime for 48 hours only.


“Someone go buy all my hopes and dreams in a bottle on [Pizza Slime] for 12k,” she says.

 

noah cyrus instagram tears
[Photo via Instagram

If tears in a bottle aren’t your thing, she’s also selling a shirt with father Billy Ray Cyrus sporting some face tattoos, a mug that reads “Noah Cyrus Tears” and much more.

dang flabbit @pizzaslime and @djskullvomit

A post shared by NC (@noahcyrus) on


If you can’t possibly live without the tears of Noah Cyrus and have an extra couple grand laying around, you can pick up some over
here.

Read more: Lil Xan and Noah Cyrus’ breakup is the most emo thing of 2018


Chances are, we’ve all had our fair share of messy breakups. You or your partner may have said some things you regret whether via text or on social media. Singer Noah Cyrus and rapper Lil Xan are no exception, and their breakup might just be the most emo thing we’ve seen all year.

The couple are no longer together, and it may be as a result of a meme, but not the VMAs-inspired one you’re probably thinking of.

The drama started over Labor Day weekend as Lil Xan (aka Diego Leanos) took to his Instagram stories to reveal he felt like he was being cheated on and “bad things always happen to the good guys,” so he’s going to be an asshole from now on.

Xan claimed their collab track, “Live Or Die,” had a video that he was not going to allow to be released, but Cyrus allegedly went against his wishes and dropped the clip herself this week.

There was some back and forth on the reason behind the breakup that could be from cheating or a Charlie Puth meme or even a setup by the duo’s label Columbia Records.

Xan recently discussed all of the drama surrounding Columbia and his breakup with Cyrus, which resulted in a lot of he said-she said commentary regarding the reason behind the split.

“It was going good at first, like the whole plan,” he says. “I’ll set the record straight: There was a plan. It was like a thing. We’re both signed to Columbia, and we just wanted to help each other out as artists, and that’s just what the label does.”

When asked if they just wanted the duo to be on a song together and not actually date, Xan claims Columbia first “gave [him] the option,” but that they did have the start of a relationship just prior to the label suggesting it.

Xan says he doesn’t want beef with Cyrus or her family, but neither of them were telling the whole truth during the breakup, and “at the end of the day, it was pretty staged.”

“I’m just going to come clean for the record; the real shit is we both were lying,” he says. “It was a mixture of both of us. It’s not one person was the holy one and one is the devil. I lied about shit, she lied about shit.”

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