Tonight Alive’s Jenna McDougall opens up about her eating disorder recovery

Jenna McDougall of Tonight Alive has taken to Instagram to open up about her recovery from an eating disorder.

The singer shared her stories to her followers for eating disorder awareness week.

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“I was throwing up for about 2 years. I would always say it was ‘the last time,’” the caption begins. “I knew it was self destructive. When it started I was really unwell and experiencing allergic reactions to everything I ate. I wasn’t seeing any results from being disciplined with my diet so I gave up on it and thought I could cheat the aftermath by purging.”

“I went to numerous practitioners of different professions but no one could help my condition. My long term doctor said he didn’t know how to help me anymore. I was so frustrated and fragile. I know my story is different to other people’s. I didn’t think I was ‘bulimic’ because my actions were motivated by health rather than body image; not to say I haven’t had cripplingly low self esteem before.”

“But regardless. It’s an addiction and it’s an act of desperation. I don’t have a success story or healing formula to share, although I have overcome my illness.”

She continued to talk about her recovery and what it was like dealing with her problems mentally.

“All I can say about my recovery is, before things started to change, I had to face some hard truths in my life. I realised, ironically as I was suppressing things in my mind, my body was trying so hard to expel something.”

“I slowly started to let the voice in my head speak out loud, no matter how harshly I wanted to judge it. Through developing a relationship with my subconscious I was able to stop denying what I knew I needed.”

Check out her full post below.

 

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I used to have an eating disorder. I was throwing up for about 2 years. I would always say it was “the last time”. I knew it was self destructive. When it started I was really unwell and experiencing allergic reactions to everything I ate. I wasn’t seeing any results from being disciplined with my diet so I gave up on it and thought I could cheat the aftermath by purging. I went to numerous practitioners of different professions but no one could help my condition. My long term doctor said he didn’t know how to help me anymore. I was so frustrated and fragile. I know my story is different to other people’s. I didn’t think I was “bulimic” because my actions were motivated by health rather than body image; not to say I haven’t had cripplingly low self esteem before. But regardless. It’s an addiction and it’s an act of desperation. I don’t have a success story or healing formula to share, although I have overcome my illness. But it’s #eatingdisorderawarenessweek and it’s through the bravery of other’s transparency, particularly @rosesunfold that I was able to identify the truth in me. I never did research on eating disorders or got therapy.. All I can say about my recovery is, before things started to change, I had to face some hard truths in my life. I realised, ironically as I was suppressing things in my mind, my body was trying so hard to expel something. I slowly started to let the voice in my head speak out loud, no matter how harshly I wanted to judge it. Through developing a relationship with my subconscious I was able to stop denying what I knew I needed. If you’ve ignored those instincts long enough it can be hard to make out the words but it just takes practice. And unfortunately more discomfort. More challenging conversations. More difficult decisions. But it all pays off. And slowly you start to uncover your original self and life gets brighter again ?

A post shared by Jenna McDougall (@nureality108) on Feb 24, 2019 at 2:48pm PST

Many fans were supportive of McDougal in the comments for her transparency and bravery for speaking out.

Last fall, McDougall auctioned off some of her Warped Tour outfits for the non-profit the Wilderness Society.

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